Thursday, November 06, 2008

Cabbage Patch two?

I listened to Dr. Mushmouth's dictation over and OVER, and I SWEAR he's saying "status post Cabbage Patch two". Seriously, I must have listened 20 times. I sped it up, and slowed it down, and yep - Cabbage Patch two was all I could come up with. So, I finally typed it all out and submitted the report for correction, dying to know what exactly WHAT kind operation this "Cabbage Patch" thing was.

Turns out it was "status post CABG (coronary artery bypass grafting) times 2". Duh! That's literally one of the FIRST acronyms they teach us. And of course doctors don't actually say each letter alone, they put them all together to make one stupid word! They keep doing this to me. They rattle off these insane sounding things without pause, so it sounds like one jumbled mess. Sed rate (sedimentation rate) such and such, alk phos (alkaline phosphatase) such and such, eos and basos (eosinophils and basophils), and now CABBAGE. Oh, and nevermind the fact that some of them even let the phone ring right next to the recorder while they are doing dictation! For heaven's sake pick up the dang phone, or hit pause! I cannot possibly hear ANYTHING you are saying! Sometimes they even eat during dictation! As if their jumbled jargon isn't enough to deal with! Ugh. I better get the hang of this, is all I have to say. Luckily, I still have a long, long way to go. I'm still in the beginning stages of transcription, so I'm hoping this will be a breeze in a few months.

7 comments:

Kelly said...

LOL!!

Paige said...

Hi, it's Paige again. I was wondering if you wouldn't mind emailing me to tell me which rental company you went through. And also I have a few other questions about Anthem. Thanks
pstanl83@hotmail.com

Mindy said...

Oh man, I could never do your job! Glad you figured it out though!

Elizabeth Peterson said...

Yikes! That is too funny. I can't believe the words you have to transcript. You are a good woman! Have you checked out my blog lately? Let me know when you have!

Thora said...

lol
My mom did transcription in a medical office for a while. She was the only one who could understand the transcription in the doctor's thick spanish accent. Job security!
Oh and guess what state we lived in then? lol

Nurse Heidi said...

Blah. I can so sympathize. We have one GI doc from India that speeks faster than I have ever thought possible through his dictations. I was watching him do one after a procedure one day and couldn't figure out what the heck he was saying. His nurse commented that he gets most of them back with 75% blank spaces that he'll fill in for the doc because he's been hanging around the doc long enough to know what he wants on there. Lame. I say, learn how to talk like a normal person! And it's just as much fun trying to read the orders in the chart. Every few shifts we'll have one bad enough that we all gather around in a huddle trying to figure it out.

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