just slingin' it

I love this one. 

Christa made this sling for me when I was pregnant with Jade. I'm finally using the damn thing, now that she's taught me how to put her in it. The thing is awesome. I have lost 7 months of baby wearing, and I'm kicking myself in the ass. 

hot slingin' mamas 

it happened again

Except this time I didn't fight it as much, and I left myself open to it, to see if I was making this all up in my head, and if I was dreaming.

I laid down for a nap yesterday, hoping to get some rest, and finally dozed off after Jade fell asleep in her crib. My dream started out with my in-laws Billy and Mandi. They just moved into a new apartment, and we were all going over to check it out. Right when we got there, the dream was interrupted, or jumped to my parent's house. I was laying on the couch taking a nap, and I could see myself from behind the couch. For some reason, I had Jade's body, so it was Jade I was looking at asleep on the couch. I knew I was having an out of body experience, so I decided I had better wake myself up. I gently touched my hand to Jades body, and I instatly woke up, but not completely. I was aware that I was in my own bed, kind of asleep and trying to wake up, but I was paralyzed completely...again. I noticed the pressure also, like something was pushing on my chest. I knew I was strong enough to overcome it, so I let it in. Just for a moment. That's when I heard it. Years ago, the sound it wade was like that of an electric hum, or a lot like the sound a guitar amp makes when the sound is turned up all the way. This time I listened very closely. The hum turned into voices. Lots of them, maybe hundreds of them. It sounded like they were on some type of frequency, and I could hear that frequency cutting in and out. The best way I can describe the sound is when you turn the knob on an am radio, and you get that kind-of high pitched noise between stations. The voices were very loud, and to me it sounded like they were talking very fast, but I couldn't make out a single word. The stronger the "waves" came, the louder the voices got. Finally I decided to wake myself up, because as you can imagine, I was getting a little freaked out.

I went out to the couch with Doug, and asked him what he thought. He thinks it was probably all in my head, and that I was just very tired. Which does sound about right. You know how you have more vivid dreams when your more tired? But...I can't shake the feeling it was more then that. Maybe I tapped into something, or actually it tapped into me. What do you guys think? Only helpful comments please. I don't need some asshole calling me crazy.

I copied this from daphnizzle. It's cool, try it.

No freaking way! See, I'm not the dumb blonde people have made me out to be all my life! So there.

The days of Green Day and Snoop Dogg

Let's see, let's see. I know I need to update. But in all honesty, I don't really have a damn thing to say. I know my blog is less then exciting, in fact it can be pretty downright boring. I'm aware of that, I really am. What can I say? I just don't have an exciting life, folks. Sorry. I HAVE noticed however, that I have done quite a bit of complaining since I started this little blog way back in January. Has it been that long? I guess so. So in the future, I swear I will try to write less negative, boring posts. That may mean I won't blog as much, but I do have to keep my small but much appreciated audience interested.

At the moment, nothing exciting is going on. Next year will be my 10 year high school reunion though, and there's a lot of buzz on that classmates website, as well as myspace. (which I was suckered into because I do have friends on that site. It's fun to network, but my loyalty to blogging lies here, to you folks) Anyway, I'm not really sure if I actually want to go or not. I mean, yes high school was fun and supposedly "some of the best days of my life" or whatever. But seriously, I was just a band geek with really big glasses, and I was thin as a rail, with absolutely no boobs. At all. I don't even know if most of those people would remember me. I had a couple boyfriends in high school, and for that reason, I'm sure Doug won't go. Christa and April really want me to go, so maybe I can share their husbands for the evening as my date. Bryan and David won't mind. I'll just pretend I'm their pimp or something, and I can have one on each arm. Christa and April can socialize with our classmates who got fat from childbirth (ha ha haaaa!! yeah, you bitches were the "curvy" ones in high school, and now you're just fat!!) and Bryan, David and I can hang out in the corner and poke fun of the "losers" who don't have jobs trying to pick up on all the chicks. Christa, April, and I will of course dress to impress. We'll be looking hot, hotter then we ever did in high school. And we will be the envy of all the pretty, stuck up snobs we went to school with. Hmmmm, maybe I will go after all. Sounds like a night of fun-filled reminiscing of days gone by, that will never (thank god) be re-lived.

a new post--FINALLY!!!!

You know what's the funniest thing I've ever seen? My ass try to jump rope, that's what. I looked like a flamboyant gay man. Seriously. Who would have thought 2 minutes of jump rope would have me dizzy and lightheaded because my ass is so out of shape? At least I wasn't the only one who couldn't hack it. There were others too, I swear!

So, Friday I decide to put my gym membership to good use. I got up early, (which in my case is 7:30) and decided to take a cardio coreball class. It's an hour long class which uses the stability ball for strength exercises, and switches back and forth between that and a cardio workout. I thought it would have been a good beginner class, since I have pretty much NEVER worked out in my life, save that little stint I had in boot camp. I probably should have started with something like YOGA. Don't get me wrong, I could pretty much hang in there until the last 25 minutes, at which point I was DYING. The lady from the childcare came in the last 15 minutes and said Jade was crying, and she wouldn't stop. THANK GOD!!! I got to get out of class early. YES!!! Let me just tell you, as I was sitting there, nursing her in the lounge, I felt dizzy as hell and sick to my stomach. I had to get my bearings for a few minutes before I could get up and leave. I felt a little better when I got home, but the next day I was so sore I could barely walk. I couldnt even get off the floor without Doug's help. I am pathetic, people!! Today the soreness is finally going away, and I feel a bit better. So yeah, I'm thinking yoga sounds good for tomorrow, and I'm not doing ANYTHING more then yoga or pilates until I can hack it. There's nothing wrong with starting slow. Really, there isn't!

what I did today

I decided to go balls to the wall blonde. I know, I was blonde before. But I just wanted more of a summer look. Yeah, I look pretty damn stoned without make-up. And yes, I need some sun. It's actually alot blonder in person. I think I like it. 

the joys of parenting

That's lemon juice in her hair. I let Jared suck on a lemon after I put the salmon in the oven for dinner. While I was deeply enthralled in Daphne's post, Jared decided to squeeze the lemon over Jade's head, and watch it trickle down her forehead. I caught him mid squeeze. You can see she's been traumatized.

Earlier in the day, I had to get my blood drawn at the dr. office. As we were waiting in the very small waiting room, an old woman with a bedpan in her hand was heading for the bathroom. As she passed us, Jared jumped up and asked her "is that your hat?" 

Got this from Penny

Your Deadly Sins

Envy: 40%

Sloth: 40%

Greed: 20%

Pride: 20%

Gluttony: 0%

Lust: 0%

Wrath: 0%

Chance You'll Go to Hell: 17%

You will die at the hands of a jealous lover. How ironic.

How Sinful Are You?

That would figure!!

Sooo, Jade rolled off the bed today for the first time. She was in our bed for her nap this afternoon, and apparently she bypassed the mound of pillows I had surrounding her. I guess I didn't hear her wake up, but I sure as hell heard the loud thump followed by an unbelievably heartwrenching wail. Poor baby. I was shaking as I picked her up and held her. She was fine of course, just scared. From now on, I'll be putting her in her own crib at all times.

prolapsed valve

Yesterday I had an echo for my heart done. Basically it's an ultrasound of the heart. The tech said I have a slight prolapse in one of the valves. I THINK that means it's pushing blood slightly backward in the valve. My appointment with the cardiologist is next month. The tech didn't seem too alarmed, seeing as it is such a slight prolapse. I'm wearing the stupid halter monitor right now, and can take it off in one hour, thank god. Jade keeps pulling at the wires when she nurses. It's going to hurt like a sonovagun to pull these sticky things off. There's seven of them. Ouch!

Conversations with my three-year-old

Me: Jared, are you going to pick up these toys?

Jared: I'm not Jared, I'm Jedi master Yoda. You're Darth Vader, and you have to fight me and say "You don't know the power of the dark side."

Nice to know what he really thinks of me, eh?


Later in the day at a crowded greek restaraunt with my friend, Ursula: (she's German people, and my hairdresser)

Jared: Mommy, i have to go potty.
Me: Jared, you just went right before we got our food.
Jared: But I have to go POOOOP!!! (most of the people sitting at the nearby tables most definatly heard.)

Kids are the coolest things on the planet.

a lenthy post, for my sake

There have been some things going on with my family that I need to vent about. I have briefly touched on the matter in a couple of posts, but I feel the need to write the story in it's entirety, to vent this out of my system.

My dad is a supervisor for the county and heads a few teams for the health department. I won't expound on this any further for fear of getting my ass in trouble if the wrong person reads this. So he's had this job for 15 years now, and has made wonderful friends through his job. One woman who works there in particular became very close with my mom. She was the closest thing to a best friend my mom had at the time. She and her daughters came to their house all the time for dinners, and her daughters called my mom Aunt Cindy. For the sake of anonymity, we will call the woman "crazy bitch", or cb for short. So cb began dating someone at their workplace. (We will call the poor soul "Dan") After a few months, the relationship turned sour, probably because she's a crazy bitch. (did I mention that?) In cb's bitterness, she filed a sexual harassment complaint against Dan, and since my dad was their boss, she took it to him, and he took that straight to his boss. It was handled, properly.

A few months later, cb decided she wanted to switch to a different department. Coincidentally, the department she wanted to be switched to, was the same one Dan happened to be in. Cb then asked my dad to take Dan out of that department, so she could switch, and be in the department of her choice. He didn't do it. This is where the bullshit starts. She got really upset and started badmouthing my dad to my mom, saying he was sexist, and discriminate. I think she filed a few complaints against him as well. But whatever, she's psycho.

Before all this happened, about 4 months prior, cb, my dad, and another lady (let's call her Kate) were on their way to a conference, all in the same vehicle. They were all great friends, and were playing a game of "slug bug". (that's where you hit the person next to you when you see a VW bug.) So kate socks my dad in the arm, and he in turn, socks her back. It's a game people, and yes, my dad is a bit unprofessional. It was all in fun.

Fast forward. After cb doesn't get what she wants from my dad, she decides to bring up the "slug bug" incident to the county, and files a "violence in the workplace" complaint against him. Even though she wasn't the one hit in the car, she claimed she was afraid of him, and wouldn't work there if he stayed. The county apparently interviewed all the employees my dad works with, and they all gave him great compliments, stating he's a wonderful supervisor, and he's never done anything to frighten them. According to the case report, none of those interviews took place. All the report says is my dad hit a woman at work, and now cb is afraid. There is now a guard posted outside my dad's office, in case he comes back in a monsterous vengeful rage to wreak demonic havoc on that poor innocent woman who sits shaking in her boots. No one at work is allowed to contact him, and he is not allowed to contact them, even though they have, to give their upmost support. He is now officially terminated, seven years away from retirement. Two years ago, all his employees, including cb voted him supervisor of the year for the entire county division. No one in the county likes cb. Their have been several complaints against her, and Dan has now left because of her (I think he's also planning on suing her for degradation of character). From what I hear, Kate is leaving also.

This whole thing is devastating to my family. My father is a good man, and he doesn't deserve this, and neither does my mother. I hope this is one of those "blessings in disguise" and they can come out stronger from this. I know they plan to sue for wrongful termination, but in the meantime, he has no income. My biggest fear is of them moving far away to the only job he can find. He's kind of in a specialized field, and I know he's been having a heck of a time finding anything for the amount of money even close to what he was making. I know this is kind of a long post for me, and thank you for taking the time to read it. I needed to get that out, and now that I have, I feel a bit better. I will keep you updated as I receive more news.

a turning of the tides

Some of you may be glad to hear I have decided to join a gym. In fact, I signed a two year contract today. Now that Jade is 6 months old, they will watch her for free on the premesis. It's a ladies gym with some great classes I plan to take. Some of which are kickboxing, yoga, pilates, and strip tease. Yep, that's right bitches! I'm gonna learn how to be sexaaaaay!!!

So here'sJade's new trick! She can now sit up without support. She's actually been doing this for a couple of weeks now, and I finally caught it on camera! 

Jade's a drool machine, and Jared's just having a good time 

he just loves her 

non-sensitivum husbandus

(see Penny's comment)

So I'm back from the doc today. Seems as though I have a bout of anxiety. Which makes sense, really. I go into panic mode when the damn dishes aren't done, and I become a raging bitch when there are toys on the floor, or if we don't go to walmart excatly the day I planned to go. And, I have a heart murmur. My ekg was fine, and I have an echodardiogram scheduled for next week, along with a holter monitor. For those of you who don't know, the holter monitor is basically a recorder taped to your chest for 24 hours. You wear it home and go about your daily routine, and it's uncomfortable as hell. I had to wear one a couple years ago when I had heart palpitations. The palpitations are back, along with a good dose of psycho anxiety disorder. (that's my own self diagnosis, thankyouverymuch) So, the two seem to go hand in hand. The more anxiety I have, the more palpitations I have, and the more my heart skips beats, and the more I get out of breath, just lying down reading my John Grisham novel. Whatever is going on with my heart is more then likely not life threatening, just more of a nuisance. After the tests come back, I'll let you all know what the happs is.

I talked with my mom today. apparently the county for which my dad works is going to get their asses sued for wrongful termination. I'm glad my parents aren't just letting that crazy bitch get away with getting my dad fired. They are actually going to do something about it, and thank god. She's already had comlaints filed against her. All I have to say to that is K-A-R-M-A.