my buddy 

Ode to my Jared monster

The moment I found out I was preganant with you was one that was full of surprise
You should have see the happiness in your daddy's beautiful eyes
As I carried you around inside I felt that for sure you were a boy
But I didn't realize how much I would love you and how my life would be filled with such joy.
I remember the day you first smiled at me, it was a moment I'll never forget.
I knew right there and then I'd love you forever, and I wouldn't have any regrets.
When you took your first steps, I smiled at you and eagerly cheered you on
knowing you were growing up, and your baby days were gone.
As the months went by I proudly watched you as you grew,
I watched you run and climb and play, as little boys often do.
I remember thinking how fast time seems to be flying by
and how I will cherish every bedtime story and snuggle I get at night.
It's amazing how fast you are growing up, I can't believe my eyes.
Before I know it, you'll be going to school and playing baseball with the guys.
Today you turn three and I love you more then I ever have before.
I can't wait to see how your life plays out, and all the wonderful things that are in store.
But for now you are still my little Jared monster, I'll enjoy it while it lasts,
and when I am holding your own baby boy, I'll think fondly of the past.
So happy birthday sweetheart, my handsome little boy
May each day be filled with fond memories of happiness and joy.

Love, Mommy

Rant

I'm so frustrated today. Hy apartment smells like trash and there are nasty dishes all over the kitchen. There's dirty laundry in the hall, the guest bathroom smells like pee, and the living room has "Justice League" action figures all over the place. On top of all that, Jade has been trying to eat my head, but refuses to nurse, AND she screamed for an hour and a half today. PLUS, Jared has just been sitting in his room for the past 2 and half hours sucking his damn thumb watching cartoons. All he wants to do now is lay around the house and watch "Teen Titans" or "Justice League". That's it. He has no desire to play AT ALL. He doesn't want to go outside, he doesnt' want to read books, no play-dough, no puzzles, nothing. Just tv. ALL. DAY. LONG. I feel lazy like I haven't accomplished anything, and I really hate that feeling. I think I'm going to get my ass up and clean the damn kitchen, and make Jared help me. I feel like a horrible mom. No more tv for Jared. Sonofabitch, Jade just woke up.

Here's a great side view 

Here's my nephew Holden and his mohawk 

Scary movies

Doug rented The Grudge tonight and is making me watch it RIGHT NOW. I really hate scary ghosty movies. HATE them. With a passion. So here I am on the laptop in the living room, trying to avoid the scary parts, you know, when the music stops and someone looks around a corner, only to see some corpse-looking ghost glaring at them, beckoning them to join the rest of the ghosts in some world they are trapped in. God that really creeps me out. I hate the ghost movies. Aliens, monsters, witches, mummys, no problem. And what's with that kid meowing like a cat anyway? Ha ha Doug, I'm not watching it!!!!!

My kid is the spawn of Satan

Kay, not really. But for Christ's sake the boy is driving me NUTS! Why is it this kid's mission in life to send me to an early grave? Huh? Tell me. He's going to be 3 in a week and I don't know what in the world has gotten into the litt:le booger lately. He talks back, he doesn't listen, he does everything opposite of what I say, and for crying out loud, I'm ready to sell him to the highest bidder. Anyone want a good-looking smart potty-trained 3 year old? (He's really smart, too smart for his own good I tell ya) Any takers?

Okay, in all seriousness, I DO love Jared TO DEATH. But why oh why does he insist on pushing my buttons to no end? For instance, this is how bedtime goes:
me: Jared it's time to brush your teeth
Jared: I don't want to brush my teeth
me: I know honey, but you have to brush them or they will fall out, and you won't be able to eat anything.
Jared: I DON'T WANT TO BRUSH MY TEEEEEEEEEETH!!!!!
me: shhhhhhhh, Jade is sleeping you have to be quiet, now brush your teeth.
Jared: (on purpose, so Jade will most defiantly wake up) NOOOOOOOO!

Okay, this kind of stuff happens ALL DAY. Everything is a constant struggle. He even shuts his eyes and covers his ears when he's in trouble so he doesn't have to listen. And folks, when he does THAT, I loose it. Nice mommy is gone. Now comes the yelling. No, I am not proud of it, in fact I hate yelling at him, especially when I'm holding Jade. I shouldn't yell at him like that, I know, bad mommy. I admit I'm a spanker too. But seriously folks, when I'm in that situation, I don't know what to freaking do. He makes my blood boil when he purposefully shuts me out. Arghhhhhh! HOPEFULLY things will get better. He didn't used to be like this. He used to be a sweet, loving little boy who listened to his mommy and didn't try to make her life a living hell.

Here's a picture of me and Doug right outside the wedding chapel. Don't you just love my gown? My hair is uncurled, my make-up came off, and I am slouching. Oh well, it was a realllllly long day. 

Here's my all-time favorite picture of Jade. I just love the way her little nose crinkles up when she smiles! 

Me and the kidlets 

here's my Jade 

here are my kiddos 

Goin' to the chapel and we're gonna get ma-a-a-ried...

So we finally did it! We tied the knot after 5 years of togetherness and 2 kids. I guess you could say it's about damn time. Vegas was a blast. I didn't realize how tiring it would be with a 2 and a half year old, and a 3 month old baby. Everything takes twice as long with the kiddies around. But it was fun just the same. I swear Jade must already be teething or something because she keeps eating her hand ALL DAY LONG. Plus she's been such a grumpy butt lately. I remember Jared at 3 months started teething, but didn't actually get teeth until he was about 6 months.
Okay, so anyway, back to the Vegas mumbo jumbo. Sunday night we pretty much walked up and down the strip watching the drunkards make fools of themselves while singing "Margaritaville" at the outdoor Karaoke bar. Pretty funny to watch I'd have to say. Jared enjoyed Excallibur and the volcano at the Mirage. We didn't get a chance to see the water show at the Bellagio though. I was really looking forward to that. We also missed the pirate show at Treasure Island, which Jared was bummed about. But I think we are going back in a few months anyway, and we will stay a little longer.
So the next day, Monday was valentines Day. After we gorged ouselves at the Circus Circus buffet for breakfast we went to the adventure dome for some rides and games. We had a great time, and Jared went on his first "mini" roller coaster. I swear the poor kid held on for dear life! At least he cracked a smile for a quick picture though.
After all the hullabaloo we headed off to the Marriage license bureau. So we go inside and get the license. Yada yada yada. Outside there are limmos with "wedding recruiters" to wisk you away to a romantic Las Vegas $40 wedding at the Las Vegas Wedding Chapel of Love. No, I am not kidding. Well, you can't beat 40 bucks for a wedding plus limmo ride right? So off we went wearing our jeans and all to this cute little wedding chapel. We got the whole Las Vegas wedding experience (minus Elvis) complete with an 8x10 photo, a rose and a sweet, romantic 10 minute ceremony in a cozy room under an archway donned with flowers and vines. It was actually quite nice. I know it may sound a little cheezy, but to me it was one of the most beautiful moments of my life. I had a hard time getting through my vows. I tried not to break into my "ugly cry" so I took my time. I have a lovely ruby ring adorned with diamond rounds set in a platinum ring. It totally suits me. It's not one of those "bling bling" rings, but I couldn't ask for a better one. Good job honey, I LOVE it! I don't remember what we said to each other word for word in those 10 minutes, but I do know we promised to love each other through better or worse for forever. Those wonderful words are some that I will never forget.

A little bit sappy

Today I have a new-found appreciation for my friends. Not that I've never appreciated them before, of course. It's just been reiterated. I just want the two of you to know how much I love you, how much I care about you, and how much I am inspired by you. You know who you are :) You are wonderful people with hearts of gold, always giving to those who need it. You are both world-class mothers, who would do anything on earth for your kids. You are beautiful, funny, intelligent and incredibly fun. I am so touched by your thoughtfulness. I hope one day I can give back to you what you have given me in the time we have known each other. You have shown me how to be a great mother and a great person. I have learned so much from you, and your friendships mean more than I can say. I'm sorry if I haven't been there for you when you needed me, we all know I can get a bit flakey! But my heart has always been with you. We have known each other a long time and you both have been there for me through a lot of stuff. Thank you for caring about me, thank you for your friendship, thank you for seeing things in me that I don't see, thank you for loving me even for my faults. You will never be forgotten, you will always be loved. I cherish you both, and now I am crying. I know I don't really say these things to you, but I thought you should know.

On a much less sappy note: I'm going to Vegas baby!!! We are going for Valentines Day. Should be fun, can't wait! I promise I will post pictures soon.

Brown paper packages tied up with strings...

These are a few of my favorite things:

~ The way my daughter's nose crinkles when her beautiful mouth curls into a smile
~ The smell of my grandma's house
~ The sound of my little boy's voice when he sweetly says "I love you mommy"
~ The peaceful look on my children's' faces when are sound asleep. (especially after a hard day)
~ Chocolate, chocolate, and more chocolate!
~ Laying in bed with my sweetheart while he plays with my hair as I am wrapped around him
~ The beautiful sound of laughter from my 2 (almost 3) year old.
~ The smell of rain
~ Doug's penetrating blue eyes
~The natural smell of Jade's head. (without baby shampoo)
~ Christmas morning
~Coming home to visit mom and dad
~ 4th of July in Bakersfield
~ Drinking grown up drinks with my girlfriends ( I miss that one terribly)
~A hearty laugh you can feel to the core
~ a clean house ( gotta love that!)
~ The smell of baking cookies ( preferably chocolate chip)
~ The color red
~ Nursing my darling Jade in my comfy rocker
~Reading to Jared just before bed as he curls his fingers in my hair.
~ The crispness of a fall morning
~ The smell of a cozy fire in a fireplace
~ Christmas carols
~ A nice bubble bath with a glass of wine and a good book. Don't forget the candles!
~

Just thought I'd share a few with you.
~

Hollywood

Okay I think it's about time to update! My house smells like trash right now, I hate that. I like to wake up in the morning and walk out to a nice, clean living room and kitchen. Nope!! We had broccoli last night and it stinks because I threw the rest away. I hate broccoli smell. My kitchen is a mess because I made apple bran muffins last night for Doug to take to work in the mornings. These aren't just any muffins, mind you. They are 6-week bran muffins. The batter lasts for 6 weeks in the fridge and the recipe yields some 6 or 7 dozen. So, I've got apple shavings and crap all over my floor.

So, anyhow, Sunday we took a day trip into Hollywood. It was a much needed break from the monotony of my domestic duties. The weather was nice, the traffic wasn't bad, Jared was in a great mood, and Jade slept most of the day. We parked in a parking garage, (5$ to park of course) and walked along Hollywood Blvd. Out in front of Mann's Chinese Theater there were a dozen or so impersonators. We got pictures with Spiderman, Wonder Woman, and that pirate from " Pirates of the Caribbean", you know, the Johnny Depp character. Batman was a dick. He was picking on the retards. (sorry, that was really un- pc, what I meant was "learning impaired" or some crap like that.) Some poor "learning impaired" kid was walking along with his fake plastic star wars light saber, when Batman snatched it out of his hand and stuck it in the poor kids face and started making fun of him! Jared really wanted a picture with Batman, but Doug told him that particular batman was fake and MEAN. ( I think batman heard, I'm not really sure) Anyway, I felt bad for Jared, but at least he got one with Spiderman, he was really cool.
So towards to end of the day, we all went to the Build a Bear Workshop. Mandi (Doug's sister) and her husband Billy, and their son Holden were with us, and Mandi wanted to get Holden a bear.
Okay, for those of you that don't know, this "Build a Bear Workshop", or whatever it's actually called is a rich kids heaven. What you do is you pick out any teddy bear in the store and you stuff it, buy clothes, shoes, sunglasses, hats, whatever. You basically get to make your own bear. Then you get to name it and they print out a little birth certificate for you. And by the time you are done, you've spent like 50 bucks on a friggin bear. Yeah, cute. So Mandi is picking out her bear all it's accessories when this huge group of kids comes for a birthday party at the store. Like 10-12 8 year olds come running into the store excited as can be. The store manager is the host of the party and he says "Okay how many of you have been here before?" All of them raise their hand. Then I hear "I have 3", and "Well I have 5". Five? Five build a bears? Rich little brats.
So anyway, while their little party is going on, Doug an I are standing near the exit because Billy is buying their bear. All the sudden I hear this loud BANG and the window rattling. I look over toward the noise and I see Jared walking away from the window. That bang was Jareds HEAD on the window. Apparently, he thought it was a doorway, because right outside the window is a sidewalk. Doug saw the whole thing. I guess he decided to take a flying leap into the window. Poor guy. He was really embarrassed, and he had a huge bump on his head. Now the bump has gone down but there is a nasty bruise on his forehead.
Even with that little accident, we had a pretty good day. It was really nice to be out.