I'm craaaaaaaaazy

So tomorrow I'm having company and today was not so much a good day. Not because I'm stressing about having company, but because the mental schedule I've made for myself has been completely shat on. It's kinda freakning me out a bit. We were supposed to go to Walmart YESTERDAY so I could do laundry all day today for Doug's trip tomorrow. I was supposed to get the kitchen floor mopped TODAY, so I wouldn't have to do it tomorrow morning. Something as little as prolonging a trip to walmart is totally stressing me out. Yesterday we had a birthday party for Dou'gs brother, so not much got done. Today we watched all the episodes of Smallville we've missed over the season, so the floor didn't get mopped, and we still haven't gone to walmart. AS I'm explaining all of this freakiness to Doug, I can feel my heart palpitate, and my temper flaring. I feel out of control. If things don't go excatly the way I plan them, I get all psycho. Well, I don't get all CRAZY psycho or anything, I just get a little OCD. Today I walked into Jared's bedroom, and I could feel some sort of panic attack set in as I saw the complete mess he was sitting in. Toys were everywhere, and nothing was organized. I don't know why it freaks me out like that. I've never been this way. Ever. In fact, I've always been spontaneous, and disorganized. For some reason I'm feeling the need to be in control of something, or have a regimented way of life. It's nuts, I know. I don't know what the hell is going on anymore. I have realized I'm fine, as long as I stick to some sort of schedule, or routine every day. Maybe I'm just crazy, after all.